There I am, sitting in my office cubicle. With that big smile plastered on my face, you would almost believe this is my dream job. But no one believes that. “I can’t wait to get into the office to lead those meetings and send those emails!” If you find me the person that says that, I’ll buy ‘em a virgin Piña Colada.
I was sitting in a staff meeting just today and the atmosphere was actually giddy for a change. Sylvia, one of my coworkers, was planning to retire in the middle of February, and we were paying her special attention since the upcoming holiday season very well may be the last one she spends with us.
Sylvia is a woman that I admire. She has taken excellent care of herself over the years, and it shows. She is bubbly and excitable, has a slender, petite frame, and looks to be in her early forties, despite being 65. I aspire to be like her when I reach her age.
Except that I don’t.
I Don’t Want to Be Like Sylvia
My manager made a comment which stirred the conversation into a direction that unsettled me. “Sylvia, the rumor is that we’ll have a buyout coming soon. Do you think you can stick with us until then?”
“Of course I can! Wouldn’t you?”
“Even if you have to wait until May?”
“I don’t care. I can stick it out.”
“I just want to win the lottery. But you deserve a break. Then you’ll be able to do what you want!”
The atmosphere was joyous and full of laughter, but I felt sick to the core. This was yet another confirmation that this is not what I wanted to do. Truthfully, no one wants to sit in an office for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week. How did we even get here?
The buyout is offered voluntarily to eligible employees. Those who have worked at the company for at least ten consecutive years would be offered a month’s salary for every year worked, up to 24 months. In return, the employee would leave the company at the end of the fiscal year (May 31st), thus saving the company money in the long run. Everyone walks away happy! The buyout is perfect for people like Sylvia, who had just celebrated her 40th anniversary the year prior, and was planning on leaving soon anyway.
Should the rumors about a supposed buyout be true, she’ll snatch it, leap for joy, and run without looking back. Finally, after 40 years, she has earned her right to “do what she wants”. Let that phrase sink in and tell me it doesn’t sound ludicrous.
I don’t want to be like Sylvia. I don’t want to work on someone else’s dream for 40 years just to earn the right to sleep in. I don’t want to ask a supervisor for permission to leave the country for three weeks. I don’t want to wait until I’m 65 to live life on my own schedule.
So where does that leave me? Well, like everyone else, I’ve got bills to pay and food to put on the table (even if I am the only one eating at that table). I wish I could say that I found the secret to online income, where I could work from anywhere in the world and make serious cash in my sleep. It sounds like such a fantasy to me, yet I hear stories everyday of people doing just that. So I suppose this is what my journey will explore. Life is exciting and life is new, and I will and form it into what I will it to be.
Until then, I’ll set my alarm one more day ’til I earn the right to grind it in a blender.
